my first girl friend...
nearly a decade after, i slept for three nights in this temple city. for years, i have wantedly refused to visit the town, inspite of fond memories filled in me fully. it was this city, i discovered myself, amidst darkness, pain, self-suffering and friendships.
i got out of the bus and walked through that street again. nothing much has changed in the street. it was a broad one with pedestrian pavements, uncharacteristic of the city. the bus stop was still there. without the shelter. seventeen years is a long time but i still remember her warm smiles and inquisitive eyes.
she, perhaps my first girl friend, surprisingly lingers into my mind as i walk. it was by chance that i arrived at this bus stop on my way to college. two girls, school students, were waiting for the bus to come. i found one of them attractive. perhaps, she too felt the same way. for i can see her liking to me from her eyes.
she looked matured beyond her age. she was beautiful. besides, she looked kind and caring. as characteristic of that generation, we never spoke to each other but only exchanged stares in silentce, in mutual admiration and affection.
from now on, i deliberately started taking this route to my college even if it meant spending a few rupees more from my always pocket, with a permenaent hole. my fortnightly allowance was a mere twenty rupee note and by then i had learnt to smoke also.
it was waste of money. but i preferred it for my friend. for a year we were friends. at least once, we came to very close to talk to each other. her friend warned against it. but could never really introduce ourselves, physically.
walking past the very same bus stop, i think of her. i suppose, she also thought me sometimes when she walked past that wide street, littered with memories of two strange souls.